What’s So Great About Pleasing People, Anyway?

Today was day 3 of Art of Accomplishment’s Connection Course. I was in a Zoom group of over 100 people and, once again, I was paired up with a stranger for most of the 2 hours. The first thing we did was something we’d done in a previous meeting—look in each other’s eyes and not talk for a few minutes. This felt, to me, like eating without counting calories. I got to feel connected with someone without having to engage with language. I got to just be and look at someone’s eyes without having to perform or think. My job was to stay in my body and stay present. Being with another person, even on Zoom, who was working at doing the same thing felt vulnerable and gracious and real.

Later on, we were doing an exercise that involved asking each other questions without an agenda, or at least trying to ask questions without an agenda. I said something about needing to please people, and my partner came back with the question, “What’s so great about pleasing people, anyway?” A good question opens doors and sometimes makes the mind stand in its tracks for a moment before it begins to stumble around for an answer to a new idea.

What is so great about pleasing people?

That’s all for today. I’m still stumbling around, looking for an answer.